Thinking about thinking about things.


I’m feeling really sick now.

With a throat that feels like a burning highway in the middle of the dessert with tractors scrapping their machines across the smoking tar.

And a nose so stuffed I could bake it into an American thanksgiving turkey.

And my head feels so heavy it could be a number 15 bowling ball.

I know i’m exaggerating but really, this does not feel good at all.

But it’s OKAY! I’m usually healthy so I trust my immune system’s working on it at the moment.

Anyway, I’m sitting in bed and I’m thinking of things. And I’m wondering if other people do this too, you know, just sitting and thinking. About what? You ask, well don’t bother asking because they flow out as easily as they flow in.

Random things. Sometimes I dwell in something random for quite a while before moving on.

What do you think about most of the time?

They say the first thing you think about when you wake up is what’s most important to you. (besides thinking, “what’s for breakfast?”)

I can’t believe I’m writing about me thinking of things instead of about what I’m thinking of like I usually do.

Anyway, I asked around with my friends at school.

“what do you usually think about?”
“what are you thinking about?” when they are completely silent.

They usually answer with a “nothing.” for both. And when I doubt them and say,”seriously? You must be thinking of something at least!”

They just tell me that their minds are really completely blank. As white as a white board cleaned by me. (I get loads of practice so I’m quite good at that) Or as white as anhydrous copper sulphate. Or as white as PVC glue. Okay I’m just coming up with nonsense similes.

How do you even keep your minds blank anyway? How is that even possible? I wish I could do that once in while. It would stop me from over thinking things I guess. I do over think a lot. Too much, until things start worrying me.

It’s like the highest stage in some yoga bliss thing right? But people say keeping your mind free from thoughts is what makes you susceptible to demon possession. So YAY! I’m totally covered, insured, because I can never have a blank mind no matter how hard I try.

So I don’t know of that’s a good or bad thing.

Today is one of those days when I just feel like lying in bed and thinking about things for the entire day. I guess some people call it ‘slacking’.

I call it, relaxing in an active state of mind.

P.S. Well at least my parents left me half a slice of this gigantic home made Russian chocolate cake coated with brown sugar and crushed caramelised walnuts and thick dollops of cream.

P.S.S. NOT that I think of breakfast first thing in the morning I don’t!

P.S.S.S. still have no idea what P.S. stands for.


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