It’s the day we’re all waiting for. It’s kind of sad in a way, how we’re all riding on this one grade, how 4 years could lead up to this moment that’s coming really really soon.
I guess this is a mark point. Tomorrow’s when things start getting serious! No more playing around anymore, people around me will start deciding their futures, and so will I. Biting their fingernails waiting for the posting results and all.
I did my best. That’s all I can really believe and hope in. I’m not gonna set some specific target for something I know that is out of my control. I don’t feel much now, no jitters in my stomach, no heart pumping lightness, just me being as cool as… two cucumbers.
It’s all God’s plan. I might feel disappointed tomorrow. I might feel ecstatic, but whatever happens, I have to learn to accept. Just like how this month has been quite a road of ups and downs, this could be one of them. I’m not going to lie to myself and say that I’ll be happy with whatever I get. I won’t. There is always this certain expectation I have of myself, but I just have to learnt to accept disappointment sometimes. (Though I really suck at dealing with disappointment)
Okay writing more about this is making me a little nervous._. so I guess I’ll just have to wait till tomorrow. My future self will come back and write a reflection on this for sure anyways.
OKAY RACHEL YOU CAN DO IT! CONTROL YOURSELF. DON’T BE A WIMP. BE COOL. BE POSITIVE. FIGHTING!
I don’t sound cool at all who am I kidding._.