To Cut or Not To Cut … That is the question

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I’ve been itching to cut my hair since…well…since a very long time now.

It’s not like I haven’t. I have been cutting my own hair for months and months and I think I’ve messed it up pretty badly. At least the back part. Now that it’s grown out you can see how weirdly uneven everything is. And there are bits that aren’t supposed to be there and bits that should be in front or behind I don’t know.

I’ve been pretty determined to try keeping it long. I think this is the best I’ve ever done! Bravo Rachel, Bravo! Part of it’s because loads of people around me are just telling me to keep it long. Well, actually this is the only reason why I’m still not cutting my hair off.

Every time I pass by my own reflection and see this long pony tail sticking out from the back of my head I just feel so unnatural! That’s why I always get it into a bun-ish thing. It looks so dead, and lifeless, and limp, and well, boring.

When I was at a chalet in Sec 2, I had to sleep downstairs on this cold wooden bench by myself because some of the girls needed a bed. (and I was the only one who didn’t want to sleep just yet) And I overheard this popular group talking. (I was trying to sleep at 5am but couldn’t so I pretended to and eavesdropped. I’m sorry._.)  This guy was asked,

“Do you prefer girls with short hair or long hair?”

“Long hair lah!”

And I just -.- (with my face facing the back of the wooden bench as I lay down of course. And my face was hidden with my hoodie. So I’m good.)

And recently I went home with a fellow part-timer, and hair was in the conversation, and he mentioned that he liked girls better with long hair too.

Ha ha. Ha.

I admit I admit, this kind of influenced me to try this long hair thing. And also because I’ve always wondered if I could ever look a little more girly with flowing locks. Man, I can’t even imagine myself in flowing locks.

I mean, even all my friends and my grandmother told me I should stick with growing it out instead of cutting it when I asked them! It feels like the whole world just wants longer strands of dead cuticle cells extending out from the Malpighian layer.

Truth is I really find long hair on me so boring! I look horrible with it down so I have no choice but to tie it in a pony tail or a bun all the time. And I don’t have the patience to give it some style with braids or anything everyday (and also because I suck at tying hair into beautiful patterns)

I’m just tired of it! And truthfully I can’t wait to get it chopped off.

And you know, it always feels more like you’re going on a cool adventure if you are a girl and you have short hair.

Why do you think Hayao Miyazaki has all his main girl characters ending up with short hair?

Plus it’ll save me so much time in the long run. I don’t have to spend 3 min tying and re-tying my hair in the morning and giving up when I can’t make it look nice-ish.

I’m just trying to convince myself now aren’t I?

I know, hair, is just hair. But it’s kind of like a personality statement, you know? It kind of defines who you are, a little.

If you have really long, beautifully maintained hair with curls, you can tell this girl loves her hair and wants to look great and has the determination to get up early in the morning to curl each lock one by one.

If you see someone with crazy dyed hair you can tell this girl is expressive and likes to stand out.

If you see a girl with cropped hair so short it’s almost like a guy’s you can tell she’s either practical or is just super cool.

If you see a girl with intricately tied hair, I don’t know, something like what they call a waterfall braid or a reverse… French braid thing she’s got loads and loads of patience (well at least when air comes to hair), like really!

I’m not going to talk about girls with short hair because it seems… Oddly self-praising. Haha.

Guys don’t really understand this I think.. How much it means for a girl to cut her hair short. It’s a big decision. Because you’ve got to live with it for the next few months or a year.

And guys will never really get to cut off three inches of hair or anything like that.

So maybe that’s why hair is just hair for them.

I used to pray as I sat in the hairdresser’s chair. I had really bad experiences with hairdressers, see. My eyesight is so bad, I can’t see how I look like only after everything is done and I put my specs on. I always get a horrible shock. And end up crying. (This was in primary school okay!)

“God God God please please, let me have a good haircut!”

I don’t think God wanted me to look pretty anyways. I’m cool with that.
Not that I’m not! I’m sure I am pretty in God’s eyes!

I meant, pretty by a worldly standard.

But that’s another blog post.

Anyways. So I’ve decided to go get my hair cut tomorrow!!!! So excited. But so scary.

 

Plus I’d get to draw myself with short hair again^_^

And I’d be cutting it because it’s what I’d want and not what everyone thinks is nice. Long. Girly. Neat. Blehh.

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