Today I shall talk about yet another creature.
This creature is totally unexpected and sudden. One minute you’re fine and the next, it dives down into your throat and sinks it’s millions of microscopic, long teeth into the walls of your throat.
It’s a really small creature, but let me tell you it has one hell of a strong jaw. And a spiky tail covered with thorns. Menacing red eyes. And a tongue that’s so long it can grab your uvula from the pits of your stomach.
And every time you try to swallow to get rid of it, it just makes it worse because it drags down your throat and it’s millions of teeth just puncture you even worse.
This is a horrible, horrible monster that also causes neck aches and headaches.
I can’t really warn you how to avoid it though.
If you ever do have the unfortune to meet it, well, say hello to sleepless nights and the inability to shout loudly. Or talk. Or be comfortable.
I appreciate how great it is to just swallow saliva without feeling like a thousand needles caressing the walls of my throat oh so generously.
This is the second time I’ve fallen sick these past two weeks. How. How is that even possible?!
Okay I’m kidding I know I’m not invincible.
But really this is weird by my standards. Am I not eating right? Or should I wash my hands more often. Haha. Ha. Or bathe earlier. I don’t know.