This is the first time I’ve ever really concerned myself about the underneath on-goings of social movements in a class. (This sentence sounds Chim)
I think there was some in my class in lower secondary, but since I was totally out of the social circle, I didn’t really know much. I just spent my days skipping around school with Wei Qian and sang Phineas and Ferb Songs.
I like being in a clique with just me and another person. If you can even call that a clique. It’s been that way since primary school. The most I would go would be three people. In Primary six, it was always just me and Chloe with our heads buried deep in our Harry Potter books during recess, and we’d just take walks around the school and talk. I think there was some hate and gossip flying around here and there, but I never really knew much.
Now, Hahahah. Ha.
I guess this is what they call a culture shock.
For the first time, I don’t really have a definite clique. Or group of friends I always constantly hang out with. I don’t know, maybe we’re all still in the experimental phase, figuring out who to trust and who will be great friends. These few days, the people I’m with sort of shift slightly from time to time, more come, and more leave, it’s nice getting to know new people but it’s less comfortable I guess!
There’s this guy who’s sort of trying to see who he can trust in the class before being friends with them. It’s really strange how different it is now, when it’s so much harder for people to trust each other. I don’t know if it’s just in Poly, or if it’s like that everywhere else. Maybe it comes as we get older.
I think I’m sort of more socially aware now. Hearing people talk behind other people’s backs, and mocking them, ridiculing them. I heard two of my classmates making fun of this girl I really like in my class too. They did (bad) imitations of her voice, as if she was really shallow and bimbotic in a sense. I felt really uncomfortable around them after that.
They joined us for lunch today, and I guess I did okay in being normal. But it just felt really weird. So I talked to Ivy more.
A part of me doesn’t want to know, but a part of me does so that I don’t do anything stupid and I so that I can avoid bad situations before it’s too late. I was thinking about which I’d prefer, but now, I think I’d rather know.
What would God tell me to do? Make peace right? Just be peaceful. Hold on, let me find the verse. I just realised where I got this memory of the verse from: THE PICTURE ON THE WALL RIGHT IN FRONT OF ME.
“Blessed are the peacemakers, for they shall be called the children of God.” Matthew 5:9 (But the 5 is missing for some reason)
Just…be peaceful. Be Switzerland. Don’t cause any trouble or stir up anything unnecessary.
As long as I have those few people I can really call friends. Okay, Just two. I think I’m good to go.
This feels so sad:( I do want to trust loads of people but the way everyone’s behaving, I think…yeah, I should be a little more cautious.