Comfort

I actually chanced upon a really great book during May, and it was something about what to say to others during difficult times and how to help other people. I like how it wasn’t a professional instructional thing, but it was more for people who just wanted to know how to be there for their friends. I didn’t read through the whole thing but I really want to find that book again.

Today was different. I like how every day feels different, actually, but today was different.

We got back our grades for an essay, and I really don’t know how to comfort someone when they know extremely well that I did pretty okay. Everything sort of doesn’t click because it’s really easy to interpret it as ungenuine.

It was kinda the same for O levels. I’ve come to realise that there’s nothing that I can say to help someone feel better. So I don’t.

I didn’t try to reason logically, “focus on what you can improve on instead”. Or say, “it’s okay there’s always a next time.” I read that you have to allow someone to feel sad and angry and disappointed to move on. I always made the mistake of forcing someone to not feel those things because I thought they were wrong and bad. I think that’s the biggest thing that made me feel even worse when people did that to me too. So I just sort of sat there. And provided physical comfort. But I dunno if that worked. I could have done more if it was a girl but. Yeah._.

People want to feel things, right? It’s like a road. You have to let that feeling come to pass you by instead of blocking it halfway through at a gantry.

I wish I knew more on how to approach certain situations.

Instead of only knowing how to send a load of cat pictures.

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